Something New

I've noticed a few things. I thought I'd give a social analysis. That may be a mistake because my social skills are not exactly up to par, but I may as well try.

Nothing lasts. That goes for everything, from stars, to light, to knowledge, to relationships. And yet, people are so surprised when things fall apart. I know I have been. Sometimes I don't realize that things have gone awry until I look back and think, "Oh, hey, I haven't seen this person in years," or maybe I'll see it instantly and cuss until my throat is raw, and then remember that nothing lasts. Get over it.

I've also realized that we, as humans, are so numerous that anything we say has probably been stated in some way before. Everything I've said, or am about to say, is unoriginal, and has been stated before. It has probably been proven wrong before, and probably will be again. Maybe the specifics are new, but our lives are unoriginal. Our situations unoriginal. Our thoughts, our future, our past, all unoriginal.

And all of this is applicable to relationships. How could it not be?

Even in the past hour or so, one of my thoughts have been proven unoriginal. Reading someone else's blog, I read something like, "Perfection is not achievable, but we should strive for it anyway because that's as close as we'll ever get." My apologies to the person whose blog this came from.

And this has been repeating. It started a few months ago, when I finally decided to bring Google into the fold as a tool for guiding my thoughts. I started by googling every one of my ideas that I had come up with on my own. I found nearly every one, and there's thousands of years of thought that haven't been recorded on Google, that I can't see, or I missed, to encompass the rest of what I've thought.

Things have been falling apart with someone very dear to me recently. Many people very dear to me.

The past three years have been very strange. 7th grade, I was quiet. My nose was constantly in a book, and I talked very occasionally. 8th grade, I was THE loud kid. Loud enough to get my class into heaps of trouble on many, many occasions, and personable enough to be proud of it. My Freshman year, I've been quiet. Period. But I've lost my love of literature. And because I've not been loud, I've lost a lot of friends, and I haven't made new ones. I'm worried about my Sophomore year. A lot of kids that know me as being loud are going to be entering my high school, and I don't know how I'm going to be able to sustain my reputation.

Well.

Trivial thoughts, right?

It's all been played out before. And this isn't exactly life-changing, either. Just a small source of embarrassment. So many people have it so much better off. I should really delete that spiel about school. A nice little rambling.

At least it's remotely connected to something.